He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
My vagina is very pro this idea
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
