she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
