First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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