I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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