im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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