fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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