Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
My vagina just clenched in fear
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
