So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
