If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I just had sex on a roof
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
