In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
