question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
