No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
