she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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