That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Randomize
