But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I want to walk on stilts...naked
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
When did angry sex become our thing?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
