I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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