the new term for farting is butt boxing.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
third nipple confirmed
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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