The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
now i know why i became what i already was.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
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