Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
