There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
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