I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
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