Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Randomize
