i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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