doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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