i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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