Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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