So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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