Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Panties = found
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
