So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Someone shattered a urinal.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
