i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
