I'm so fucking centered right now
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
