scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
