Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
