I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
My vagina is very pro this idea
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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