You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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