I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
you will always have a special place in my vag
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
