I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
