Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize