last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
It's official drugs can't kill me
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
