Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
