What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
