Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I just found a bag of teeth...
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
