you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
