what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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