i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
