Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
