I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i would punch a child for taco bell
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
