I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
