I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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