Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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